(Yeah, that's what the folks at Laguardia thought, too. Read below for yet another tale of Mark's run-ins with the terrorist watch list.)----------------------------------------------------------
I got on the 6 a.m. shuttle this morning from Laguardia to Boston, but not before I got the pre-requisite funny look and "Did you know you're on the Federal 'Do-Not-Fly/Undesirables' list?" from the person checking me in at the counter (before he/she has to call someone to get authorization and allow me to get on board the plane.) Luckily, I didn't have to get the body-cavity search this time....that's just not pleasant.....and no, I don't want to talk about it... What kind of terrorist would use my name?? Is it some cruel joke? Is he even Irish? Can I blame "Dubya" for this??(Yes). I don't see anything bad pop-up while I'm self-googling!! (It's always a good time when you can drop the term "self-googling", isn't it?) I'm thinking of using my new alias, courtesy of the Time Warner cable bill, Mark Slynn. No one suspects Mark Slynn!!!! Or possibly combining my last name with Sarah's and becoming Mark Flassner, oddly enough, that last name already exists...but they don't appear to have a Mark yet, I'm sure they'd welcome me with open arms.
But then, If I change my name, the terrorists have already won. I need to start a petition with all the other Mark Flynns of the world to clear our good name, but not before we find the bad apple and force a name change, and then tattoo his new title on his forehead. (I might be a little too bitter about this subject, but I need to defend my good name!!)
But for now, I'll just have to stay careful when packing my luggage, to make sure I don't leave any bomb residue or hand guns in my carry-on.
Until the next time that I get to guest rant,
Mark Flassner
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